You Can’t Lead Anyone If You Aren’t…..

Written by on March 9, 2016

…..committed to your own personal growth.

How can you be trusted to help cultivate other people’s potential when you aren’t living up to your own? It’s one of the biggest reasons people ultimately fail at developing other people, which is the primary function of leadership…AND of parents! Most people have heard the phrase “fake it ‘til you make it” and many are living that out. It’s okay to fake it for a while, provided you’re doing the work that will get you where you want to go.

How can you be an amazing leader or parent if you aren’t continuing to improve personally? If deep down in your own gut, you don’t feel deserving of success? I can’t tell you how many incredibly talented people I’ve met that have no idea how special they are. How does that happen? Was it something their parents said? A teacher that embarrassed them during class? A coach pushing too hard? A spouse? (or ex-spouse) A sibling? How can someone give all of his power to someone who is probably not living up to his own potential?

People spend millions of dollars on books, seminars, psychologists, and life coaches, trying to “live up to their potential”, yet never really master it. Hey, just the fact that you want to “up your personal game” is a huge part of the battle but what more can you be doing?

Have you ever met or spent time with someone that has made a commitment to grow or improve their life? They seem to be living a BIGGER life than you? Don’t you love spending time with them?

Or maybe you were that person! You were on the right path, you had it figured out, and then one day the spark was gone. The energy that made you jump out of bed somehow disappeared. Perhaps someone you value threw a big bucket of water on the “fire” that was fueling you. Maybe you just jumped in a big pool and extinguished yourself by being complacent. Over time, you started to buy into what you believed were flaws about yourself. You accepted them as the “truth.”

Here are a few questions for you to consider:

Do you think you need to make some changes in your routines?
What do you think is holding your back?
What are you most passionate about?
What are your self-limiting beliefs?
What is the worst thing someone has ever said about you?
Is what they said true?
How does that statement play out in your life day to day?
Who is on your personal Board of Directors? (who is giving you counsel?)
What are you proactively doing to make your life BIGGER?

It would take days to answer these simple questions. Most people have never thought about their own self-limiting beliefs, the deep-down feelings of self-worth. After a lot of introspection, most people do come to the conclusion that there are things they are unconsciously believing that aren’t even true.

I love the title of Byron Katie’s book, “Who Would You Be Without Your Story?” You don’t even have to read the book (but you should) to understand the point. What is your success story? What do you believe deep down in your gut you truly deserve? It’s important to know because it will define you at some point. It will drive you or sabotage you, and it’s totally your choice.

Leading people effectively requires an in-depth understanding of your own self-limiting beliefs and a huge dose of personal awareness, neither of which is easy to ascertain.

Let this be the time that you finally do something about the old tapes playing in your head that have been holding you back. There are people depending on you….co-workers, bosses, children….and YOU.