I bet something like this has happened to you…Your co-worker asks you to help on a project, and instead of just saying no, you hesitate and ultimately end up taking on more work. Or…Someone reaches out to grab dinner on a day you planned to stay home because you are exhausted, and you find yourself saying sure, that sounds great! Or…someone asks you to a concert, and you say, “Yes, I love that band,” when you know you hate being out past 9:00 for any reason at all. Or… Someone asks if you can make time for a cup of coffee early on a Saturday, and you say sure, even though your plan was to sleep in and stay in your pajamas as long as possible.
Saying no quickly can actually be the better strategic choice in many situations.
First and foremost, saying no quickly allows us to be more efficient with our time. When we say “maybe,” we’re essentially putting the decision on hold. This means we continue to think about it, analyze it, and potentially gather more information before we can make a final decision. This takes up valuable mental energy that could be used for other tasks. By saying no quickly, we can immediately move on to other things, which helps us stay productive.
Additionally, saying no instead of yes can increase our credibility and reliability. When we’re wishy-washy with our answers, people may begin to doubt our abilities or our commitment to the task at hand. They may see us as indecisive or untrustworthy. However, saying no quickly can demonstrate that we’re confident in our abilities and that we’re committed to our current priorities. This can help build stronger relationships with our colleagues and earn their trust and respect.
Of course, it’s important to note that saying “no” quickly doesn’t mean being rude or dismissive. It’s important to communicate clearly and respectfully. While I don’t advocate that you explain your reason for saying no, I do advocate having a go-to statement to help contextualize the no.
Here are a few statements to consider:
I have another priority I’m working on
My availability is really limited for the next few weeks
I’m not able to, but please consider me next time
No…but thank you for thinking of me
May I get back to you in a few days?
Who is most likely to ask you to do something you don’t have time to do? Be prepared before you are asked, and it can help you keep good boundaries. Having a good answer ready to go, can help you be prepared and still maintain positive relationships with your colleagues while also being strategic and efficient with your time.
Lastly, when you say yes to other people, you are saying no to yourself and your priorities. You can also slowly build up resentment and sometimes even blame the other person for taking advantage of you. Let’s be clear…YOU created that by always saying yes! Let this be the prompt you need to create a timely response that keeps you from saying yes to things you shouldn’t or don’t want to.
